Have No Expectations
Steve Chandler, Coach, Speaker, Author Extraordinaire
You have two choices in your relationships with others. You can have relationships based on expectations, or relationships based on agreements.
Expectations are cowardly and self-defeating. They are cowardly because by expecting things of others I place all responsibility outside of myself. I expect my co-worker to do his job right, I expect my family member to behave a certain way, and the list goes on. When I am unhappy it's because of them. Expectations lead to disappointments. It's a miserable life expecting so much of others and suffering so much disappointment and betrayal.
There is a happier, more creative way ... a way that is both effective and spiritual at the same time, and that's a life of NO EXPECTATIONS. If something isn't happening, I create an agreement.
Agreements are courageous and creative. They honor the other person. They are co-authored between two composers of the agreement. People give their word and keep it. People honor agreements to a far greater degree than they live up to expectations. They feel stressed when their head is full of expectations of them. They feel pressure and resentment. They rebel. (Ever notice? Do you have children? Do you have employees?)
But create a good agreement? Both sides win. It's like writing a song together, like Lennon and McCartney writing together...."and, in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."